Meet the Ghast

Once upon a time, three terrifying ghosts visited me in the dead of night. They demanded I change my wicked ways and become a less horrible, selfish person. "But I love being a horrible, selfish person!" I whined. "How about I just write about ghosts on Minecraft.net more instead?" Surprisingly, they agreed. Compromise FTW!

The Ghast, then. A ghost that can breathe fireballs - and as scary scenarios go, that's pretty strong. These tentacled terrors haunt the Nether/our nightmares. At least they keep their eerie red eyes shut. Until the Ghast learns you're around, of course. Then the eyes and mouth snap open, and it produces a high-pitched wailing shriek that'll make your ears seriously consider retiring.

And then the Ghast starts pulling its favourite trick - spitting explosive fireballs at you. We're not exactly fans of having regular spit spat at us tbh, so this flamey new twist hasn't exactly got us jumping for joy. More running for fear.

Yeah, truth be told, as ghosts go, the Ghast is barely scarier than Casper the friendly one. It's just too darn adorable to be truly terrifying. I even keep a little Ghast figurine on my desk, and I'm such a wimp, I can't even see a shadow without bursting into tears.

One thing Jens doesn't know, is why the Ghast looks so sad. So we've come up with a few theories of our own. The Ghast is so depressed looking because:

• No one wants to 'hang' with a fire-breathing ghost.
• It's never once managed to eat an ice cream without melting it before it even got close to its mouth.
• It can't get over the fact that Peter Capaldi is really leaving Doctor Who.
• Its 'Meet the Ghast' page on Minecraft.net is full of jokes so bad that it's going to haunt me forever.