If the scrawled calculations on my walls and ceilings are correct, another calendar month has passed. And that means it's time for me to tell you about all the exciting add-ons, mini-games, skins, textures, and mash-up packs that are available for Marketplace Pass and Realms Plus subscribers. 

There's a lot of ground to cover this month, so it would be irresponsible of me to let you continue reading before we've all limbered up appropriately. I recommend 10 minutes of focused stretching before you so much as skim another short paragraph. You wouldn't want to pull a muscle.

Feeling flexible and energised? Me neither! Let's begin.

ADD-ONS

I consider myself a pretty adventurous guy. Just this morning, for example, I tried a new brand of oatmeal (I didn't care for it and will never make that mistake again). But even I was amazed at the level of adventurousness on display in AdventureCraft 1.1 Add-on by Octovon. This heaving add-on introduces hundreds of new blocks and items, as well as elaborate structures to explore, powerful magics to master, and even a leathery assortment of dragons to battle or tame as you see fit.

When somebody mentions security, we all know there's one thing that comes to mind: the lean, rippling muscle of my retinue of bodyguards. But on those rare occasions when I'm not surrounded by burly chaperones, I turn to Security Expansion Add-on by Teplight. This high-tech add-on includes a host of cameras, monitors, sensors, and even lasers that enable you to fortify your home against intruders and ne'er-do-wells. And if that still doesn't leave you feeling safe, just craft yourself a loyal guard to stand watch over your precious valuables. Now that's peace of mind. 

Now, before we continue I really must address that smell. You've noticed it too, right? It's even more pungent than usual, and I think it's partly the fault of all these animals. You see, Wildlife Add-on v1.2 by PixelHeads adds more than 80 items and 35 new animals to your Minecraft worlds, including adorable red pandas, powerful gorillas, and appallingly stinky hippos. 

Speaking of odors, the next experience to burst onto Marketplace Pass this month is Zombies Add-on by Builders Horizon. This add-on introduces 28 new varieties of shambling undead for you to sock, biff, and wallop, including a posse of terrifying boss zombies. Fortunately, there's also an arsenal of new armor and weapons to help even the odds against these rotten creeps. 

I know what you're thinking: why is this article suddenly dripping wet? Well, that must be because we're plunging into the briny deep courtesy of Ocean Expansion Add-on 3.0 by Hourglass Studios, which features an astonishingly large lineup of 84 of the planet's dampest animals. And, as if the promise of cavorting with lobsters, sea horses, sharks, and rays isn't enough to make you take the plunge, there's even an underwater vehicle for you to pilot.

The use of tools was once thought of as a uniquely human trait, but we now know that primates, dolphins, and corvids are all capable of using tools. That's impressive, but can a chimpanzee craft night vision goggles, slingshots, and jetpacks? I certainly hope not. Just think of it – they'd be unstoppable. No, I'm pretty sure that for that kind of thing you'd have to look to Tools by Misfits, which also features handy gadgets such as a mini hot air balloon, a specialised fishing boat, and even a grappling hook. 

Ever wished more of Minecraft's mobs were undead abominations that exist in defiance of the natural order? Me too! Living Dead by TNTgames features undead versions of wolves, creepers, Endermen and more, as well as a fearsome new miniboss: the Skeleton King. Best of all, these reanimated mobs will fight enemies for you while you heroically look on from your noble vantage point (a nearby hole). 

Sometimes, there's nothing else for it but to whomp an adversary in the chops. For times like these, Combat Utilities by Glowfischdesigns is just the ticket, introducing a host of quality-of-fight features such as enemy health bars, off-hand weapons, and even a couple of all-new negative effects to ensure that your battles are more tense, more dramatic, and more visually spectacular than ever. (Coincidentally, 'tense, dramatic, and visually spectacular' are the three adjectives I've asked to have etched into my gravestone when the time comes).

Last but not least, we have Stitched Monsters Add-on by SandBlock Studios, which I'm sure will be a lovely, relaxing way to end this bumper list of add-ons coming to Marketplace Pass. Oh wait. Oh no. This hair-raising Survival world pits you against a cavalcade of menacing marionette-ish monsters. Overcoming these sew-and-sews will require you to create your own unique minion and make effective use of the 46+ weapons, tools, and armor on offer.

MASH-UP PACKS

Cities are great. Where else could you hope to find soaring skyscrapers, artisanal sandwich vendors, and the gnarliest, most battle-hardened pigeons all on the same street? The Ultimate City Mash-up by Ascent aims to reproduce this metropolitan splendor by offering a 2,000 by 2,000 world filled with unique urban locations to explore. Pound the city streets on foot, or steer one of more than 30 cars, boats, and helicopters towards your destination.

MINI GAMES

When powerful new mobs stalk the land, you'll need an upgraded arsenal of weapons to fight back. That's the premise of Biome Weapons [DX] by Logdotzip, which offers more than 20 elemental weapons for you to wield, each tied to a specific biome. Will you use the Cherry katana to soar through the sky? Or perhaps you'll manipulate the ground itself with the dripstone gauntlets. Me, I'll be bopping skeletons into the middle-distance with the birch bat. I think I can get a home run with a bit of practice.

Some combinations are greater than the sum of their parts. Think peanut butter and jelly. Coffee and donuts. An entire pack of butter and literally any other food (my personal favorite). These beloved pairings prove that two is often better than one. Similarly, Combine Mace by 5 Frame Studios lets you combine maces with other items to create weird and wonderful new weaponry, including the clockwork mace, the quartz mace, and the molten morning star. Is there a butter mace? 5 Frame Studios have stopped responding to my (many) emails on the subject, but I remain determined to find out.

An RV is a recreational vehicle, not a fashionable new abbreviation for red velvet cake. I already knew this and I'm holding a dainty cake fork for unrelated reasons. RVs by Lifeboat features seven rugged RVs and camping trailers, enabling you to get behind the wheel and soak up the beauty of the great outdoors in Arizona, South Dakota, Utah, and Colorado. And once you reach your campsite, you can bed down for the night in a tent or go exploring in an ATV, boat, or even a helicopter. 

High school is a time to make friends, to learn, and to discover your passions. Just look at me: I made friends with the school's oldest librarian (Edith), I learned that Edith was engaged in a series of bitter legal disputes, and I discovered a passion for photocopying while preparing Edith's complex courtroom defence. High School Roleplay by Dodo Studios isn't quite like that, but it does feature a scholastic smorgasbord of custom furniture and models that bring the classroom experience vividly to life, as well as the option to duck out of class to play football, tennis, basketball, and more. 

A floating island. An endless abyss. And an extremely unpredictable variety of block. These are the key elements of Skyblock Lucky Block 2 by Blocky, which adds a dash of peppery hot sauce to the classic skyblock experience by introducing lucky blocks. Break them open to generate a randomised surprise: it could be a lovely surprise or – if my experience is any indication – a horrifying swarm of pulsing creepers.

Rain can be a real inconvenience, but I think we can all agree it would be considerably worse if each raindrop was replaced by hunks of dense obsidian, weighty concrete, and filthy dirt. Yet that's exactly what's going on in The Sky is Falling! By Lifeboat, and to succeed in this world of plummeting blocks, you're going to need fast reflexes and a magpie's eye for glittering valuables. Will you be able to defeat the dragon before being buried by blocks?

TEXTURE PACKS

Much like a grilled cheese sandwich or a human lifespan, this texture pack is made up of two equally exciting and important halves. The first part of The Ultimate PvP Texture Pack by Honeyfrost to consider are the user interface tweaks and refinements it introduces – including transparency, a range of color-blind friendly modes, and special crit particles. Then there's the raft of PvP goodies, like short swords, 3D armor, low shields, and much, much more.

Pastel Paradise by Heropixel Games is a gentle, calming pack that reimagines your worlds in the kind of gorgeous pastel tones that could soothe even the most bad-tempered Minecraft.net writer (I'm not talking about myself. Why would you assume that? How dare you. Get out.) This comprehensive pack retextures your entire world, as well as introducing new mob, animal, and boss models. 

SKIN PACKS

Minecraft's wardens are pretty tough, I guess, but I can't help but wonder if I might actually be much stronger, more resilient, and beautiful. My friends say I'm wrong (and that they're 'work acquaintances at best') but I understand what they're hinting at: that I should fire up Wardens by 57 Digital and use one of the ten included skins to make myself look even more physically imposing than ever before. 

If, on the other hand, you're hoping to become the human embodiment of sweetness itself, Strawberry Trends by ManaLabs is the skin pack for you. With 10 strawberry-themed skins to choose from, you might even say that this pack is berry nice! And then you might applaud at that astonishing display of wordplay, and maybe even bounce me up and down on your shoulders while cheering. Just a thought. 

And then there's Cozy Cats HD Skin Pack by CupcakeBrianna, a pack that's not content to simply provide you with 10 cute cat skins, oh no. These are cute cats wearing adorable little outfits. Look at the tabby wearing a fetching little sweater! Look at the tortoiseshell moggy in a precious cableknit! Look at the kitty wielding a sword and threatening to take all my stuff. Wait, what?

CHARACTER CREATOR ITEMS

Wowzers, that's a whopping 21 add-ons, skin packs, texture packs, mini-games, and mash-ups - and somehow we're still not done! That's partly because there's a lot of cool stuff hitting Marketplace Pass this month, and partly because my editor is a cruel taskmaster who refuses to let me sleep.